Negotiations

Negotiations are taking place all over the world, but none can be more difficult then those that are taking place at the Voss home.

Mommy Voss is in tight negotiations with both the LuLu and the MyMy. Strategies are in place and maneuvers have been organized hoping that somehow a compromise can be reached. Some battles have been won, while others have been lost. So far, the mortality rate, is zero.

Over break I have entered the dark and lurking cavities of bedroom closets, and drawers. I have also reached my hand under dreaded bedskirts and dressers hoping to "dejunk" the area. Much has been collected in the last 6 months. All collections are very important and symbolic to the two lovely girls.

A bowlful of fingernails may appear to be something eerie and disgusting to someone, yet has become a great treasure to an eight-year-old.

Getting rid of 15 stuffed animals from a collection of more than 50 has also required great negotiations. My reasoning of "you have too many" cannot compare to "but that stuffed animal is Baby Burp's best friend's mother". (Baby Burp is a 3 inch stuffed walrus from a McDonald's Happy Meal from over 5 years ago.)

A science-fair project, the first of many, is also considered something valuable. Pictures have been taken, copies of pages have been made. All have been placed in a scrapbook. This small strategy does not even come close to the large actual size of 38 x 42 inches. When asked how often does one look at said science-fair project, the response was, "just now, when I took it out of my closet to clean". Negotiations too amazing to touch!

A few years ago, I received some amazing advice. Buy their valuables at garage-sale- prices. In-genius! Then, children could use the money to buy something new. It sounded like a fool-proof plan. I never thought of using money to negotiate. I had a huge advantage, in which I would truly win! I didn't however, because my children obviously have shopped at high-end garage sales, where items cost more than shopping at Neiman Marcus. I couldn't afford their prices, and they were not willing to barter.

Negotiations have gone on for 3 days now, and I haven't been very successful. Maybe I'll have more luck negotiating at the United Nations. One could hope!